FEELINGS AFTER THE CAMP

while playing landgames at ytd's camp..
i sang alot of songs..
my group keep singing one..
alot alot alot of my love songs!!!!
he sang too...
then i heard my favorite..
yu ai!
he sang too..
i sang whole song..
i love it while singing the same one with him...
then we played one 2 juss
i keep on lose alwin...
or else i should be winning ad...
he touch my shoulder cal me to go..
i feel he treated me as a sis..
wel..
so ?
how come my love journey so susah payah one?
suppose getting different group with him cos i changed the booklet..
but then..
their tcer say u must change back to the asal one..
haiz..
then same group with him again..
b4 changing back..
my son say..
u 2 suppose got"yuan "got "fen"
but then u sendiri make until got"yuan but dint have "fen "..
then now change back to same group...
my son say again..u to memang got "yuan "got "fen "
too got "yuan "got"fen:" O.O
then i stood..
really?
or i think too much/?
then i just..
follow the meaning of my name 
"sui yuan"
i sit bside him..
stil cant stop looking at him..
but then dun dare to talk..
while he pulling me backwards..
im scared..
heart beat damn high`
nah nah nah..
we wont have any chance to get same group anymore..
i noe that..
it might be good to me in not worried to talk with him..
but same group with him..
also my wish..
so..
im so so so ..
haiz..
sadness..
emo ..
moody...
who am i?
and i feel that..
while everyone noe who is amanda lai
all use another kind of eyes looking at me..
ya i noe that..
he told alo of people our things..
so i feel unnatural while they looking at me in that way..
why??!!!
please!! dun let this happen again..
i dont want anyone use that kind of method to look at me at that kind of way!!
i told some of my friends too..
but they just look at me
not you~
why!!??
ask the god..
god..
please bless me!